Monday, 11 April 2011

You broke the deal!

What would break 'your' deal?

.....the other day I was watching Tyra banks and there was an episode on ' deal breakers' and it made me wonder maybe one ex or the other broke up with me because I 'broke' the deal.... Well her team came up with all sorts of potential deal breakers and the public took a vote.
Would you leave a man because he was short?
Would you leave a man because he had bad breathe?
Would you leave a man because he was bad in bed?
Would you leave a man because he snores? (bear in mind, some snores could be likened to a thousand cats being circumcised simultaneously with a blunt razor blade)
Would you leave a man because he lived with his mum?
Would you leave a man because he couldn't dress properly?
Would you leave a man because he went Dutch?

I could relate to all the deal breakers....except a man who lived with his mum..... And I have never dated anyone shorter than me. At a diminutive 5'6.... It will almost be sacrilegious to do so. The poll also revealed that shorter men would need to earn about 150% more than the average man to actually get a date (according to Internet dating) oh dear! It's a hard life for the dimensionally challenged.

To be honest, I haven't dated any 2 men who were alike.....I pretty much judge a guy with what he presents during the dating stage. For instance I currently face a dilemma. Ok, I am currently dating. I am dating vigorously Abi na rigorously and I am enjoying meeting different people and learning from them. This one guy seems nice, cool, laid back and pretty much the opposite of me. He is quiet. I like that. But anytime he sends me messages he uses text language.....*insert ridiculous silence here*........ I mean he is much older than me but types stuff like :"So when wil u b in de shop". I almost cringe anytime I get a message from him and I confronted him but nothing came out of it. Do bear in mind, he didn't even put a question mark. For me I think it's a problem. Does that mean he cannot spell? On the other hand he gets me...he truly gets me. We share a penchant for adventure, adrenaline rush and sky diving etc but the text talk is off-putting! TOTALLY!!! My male friends thinks I am nuts for not dating him cos of that.....the girls agree with my concern...*sigh*

On a tangent, I find some men in this century pretty lazy and irresponsible. What's going on? Some men want to skip the dinner dates and head straight to the main event under the pretext that they want marriage and are not keen on dating for too long. I think a man should buy me a couple of meals AKA dating before asking to know my post code. Ahn Ahn....there are no free lunches. Imagine a bloke asking me to come over to his house or asking to come to my house as he doesn't feel safe in restaurants or public places because of the elections. *you don see mumu* I told him the only place I feel safe at is Obudu grill at the Sheraton.... That certainly broke the deal for me....

So what will be the utmost deal breaker for you?!

M'je

15 comments:

Adura Ojo (aka Naijalines) said...

"Imagine a bloke asking me to come over to his house or asking to come to my house as he doesn't feel safe in restaurants or public places because of the elections. *you don see mumu* I told him the only place I feel safe at is Obudu grill at the Sheraton...."

I laughed, reading through your post. May be he can't spell or can't punctuate. But he wants to know where you live? Perhaps it's just to test his navigation skills. SMH

Anonymous said...

Heheheheheheheehehe

kitkat said...

Lol i also cnt stand people that cnt spell correctly.. eish some txts jst make me weak. The deal breaker for me is someone that gets angry easily and someone that doesnt take care of himself.

Yankeenaijababe said...

My sister run from such guys, are you for real? na chin chin, unbelievable, no free lunch o, a real man will wine, dine you and get to know ya first before anything...Have a fun day.

Ginger said...

Asking to come to your house and ger free lunches is both a sign of a cheapskate and someone who wants to chop as early as possible. msheeew.
Deal breaker is bad spoken English. Body odor.

The date that texts badly..does he speak badly too? if thats the only bad spot hmmmmm. http://www.mamuje.com/2011/02/how-low-can-you-go.html

Myne Whitman said...

A friend showed me some texts from his GF and I frowned. He asked why cos this was a lovey-dovey text baring her heart. For me it was a deal breaker, lol...It was text speak, and there was a wrong spelling. So totally with you on that.

More dealbreakers, a shorter man (I am 5'1) an arrogant, stiff-necked man, and the biggest, someone who thinks women are subservient, inferior, must be submissive, etc...

SHE said...

I detest text speak as well. I simply can't stand it. In fact, I think it reflects an underlying low level of intelligence in the writer (my bias).

One major dealbreaker is a man without respect - for me, for other people, for other people's property, etc...

Mamuje said...

Adura- the matter serious oh

Kitkat- I agree, angry men should be avoided like a plague. It's toxic

Yankeebabe- now I demand 3 dinner dates before any real consideration, I need to know he will be able to feed me. :-)

Ginger, Myne & SHE- I thought I was alone on the text talk. It shows a low level of intelligence jare.

itsjustmedaringtodream said...

:) My deal breakers are simple. Must have hair. Must have teeth. Must have good hygiene and must love me explicitly. I think we all have our deal breakers. If not, we'd be settling all through life unhappily OR greedily grasping at any and everything...

Mena UkodoisReady said...

Just like you, I despise text speak. Its just annoying!! So I dey your back.

Then as for modern men, na wah oh. Particularly this paragraph:

Some men want to skip the dinner dates and head straight to the main event ... Imagine a bloke asking me to come over to his house or asking to come to my house as he doesn't feel safe in restaurants or public places because of the elections.//

Such men are such turn offs!

I sometimes wonder what happened to the wooing process. Now its all about sexual assets and financial worth, no magic, no finesse, no courting.

Its like we are reverting back to the olden days, when a man and his family will walk up to his neighbour and announce 'i saw a flower in your garden I want to pluck for 12cowrie bride price.

Its still better than one heediot gold digger like that! Imagine after asking a babe to marry him, he said they should do the introduction (in Nigeria) then go to UK for their masters before doing the proper wedding. They both came to London for their masters. Only for the heediot to tell his brides parents to pay his school fees, else he wont proceed to the rest of the marriage!

Of course the 'marriage' was called off! In the wise words of Chris Rock; Nothing dries up pussy like asking a woman to cover the bills.

Ah well, sex and money makes the world go round. LOL

Mena
http://efemenaoreoluwa.blogspot.com/2011/04/you-deserve-to-be-sexually-assaulted.html

Anya Posh said...

LOLOL @ "...in de shop"! ha, which kain wahala be dis. That'll definitely be a deal breaker for me. If he doesn't spell right, or if his pidgin doesn't make sense in text form, it makes me think he's negligent - like he doesn't care enough to compose a proper sentence in english or pidgin.
Or if his texts are fraughts with stupid typos, I feel dude doesnt even have the courtesy to proof-read the messages he's sending to me. In my head, translates to he'll be negligent in caring for me. Go figure.

Another deal breaker is looking unkempt o! Ha...i no do if you don't look fresh, bushy hair, dry ashy skin, dirty fingernails, or mouth odour...all those are HUGE TURN-OFFS!

Lara said...

hehehe...
having H-factor and speaking as if you went to ajanlekoko high school is a no no for me.

I think people have gotten pretty lazy typing or writing good English nowadays. So far his spoken English is presentable, then dont worry about the written part.

Short man is a no no, i no tall, i go come add shortingo...hell to the no

taynement said...

I was all ready to comment and say that it was a deal breaker, then I read where you said He gets you he really gets you and maybe I am in the minority that's a lot more important than text speak. As long as he wen tto school and can speak english, it's fixable, no? Goodluck!

Dealbreaker : foul breath, not believing in a higher power aka God.

Original Mgbeke said...

Text speak is such a pet peeve, but if this dude checks everything off then it shouldn't be a deal breaker. I'd definitely close eye and grin and bear it.
You won't kill me sha! You said Obudu at the Sheraton...Hahaha. I don't blame you jare, what kind of cheapness be that? Hisss.

I'm with Taynement on not believing in God, foul breath, and I will add being obese, being a cheap skate and uncurable body odor.

Mamuje said...

Daring to dream- weird call I adore bald men. Hehehehehe

Mena- we have seen them gold digging heediots innit?

Anyaposh & Lara- I am still finding the text talk irritating oh. I can't lie. He ticks a lot of boxes but eh.....

Taynement & O Mgbeke- well the guy is super God fearing and drags me to church on weekdays sef. I had to have a sit down conversation with him about the text talk and dude says he will make an effort. I dey wait for effort oh.